Tuesday, February 15, 2011

The Wagon--

--I more or less fell off of it.  Not all the way, more like hanging off the side with my feet dragging the ground, holding onto the edge for dear life before falling into the dust and getting left.  That's where I'm at!

Let me first state that as of January 31st, I had AMAZING "Back on Track" results at boot camp, losing nine pounds and seven inches.  The entire month was full of new challenges for me, changing both my eating and drinking habits, as well as getting back into the swing of waking up before the sun to get my ass kicked four days a week.  I went from having two "dry" days a week to five days of being alcohol-free.  I ate more fruit and veggies and worked harder physically in one month than I probably did in the six months prior.

I almost wish I hadn't seen the results.  It led me to believe I could take a bit of a break and relax.  A cheat day every now and then is a must in an effort to keep sane and feel like I'm not depriving myself.  However, I pretty much had a cheat week...or two.  More than once, after downing roughly a bottle of wine over four hours, I decided to shove 1,000 more calories worth of Krystals into my face (the amount of Krystal Burgers for the amount of calories is sad, people!).  There were the slices of pizza that I justified because they were topped with veggies (washed down with more wine--for the healthy antioxidants, of course).  Ice cream, cup cakes, soft drinks, Superbowl Sunday (aka who-knows-what I ate), the list goes on and on.  How did I choose to burn those extra calories, you ask?  Why, by laying on the couch watching Law & Order reruns all day each day on the weekends and several nights after work!

On the one hand, I know how terrible of a thing it was to do to my body.  It helped me feel better in the moment, but a few hours or even just minutes later and I wasn't so sure.  I was tired, sluggish, and my digestive system hated me.  On a postive side, I was able to recognize the correlation between how I feel emotionally when eating healthy (stable, at peace) verses after 3 nights in a row of drinking and vegging out (anxious, irritable).  I don't think I would've noticed this as drastically before.  I also realized that I tend to get more out of my workouts when I've given myself the proper fuel to push through them.  Lastly, I discovered that my metabolism is beyond forgiving!  If I keep up the hijinks of the last couple weeks it will begin to show some wear, but for now the scale hasn't budged more than a pound. 

I'm not going to be perfect.  It's going to be a long while before eating healthy is 100% second nature and I quit debating on whether or not to get out of bed in the AM to face the gym.  Maybe I did F- up the past couple of weeks, but it didn't come without a few lessons learned and motivation to do better.  New days were invented for a reason and I'll take them as an opportunity to put down the cheeseburger, brush off the crumbs, and start fresh!

3 comments:

  1. hummm....so maybe my lack of exercise in the winter is why i'm depressed and drink alot and feel like crap. the cold weather makes me want to do nothing but come home and get up covers. ok, i don't know what that has to do with you but anyway i think you should not be so hard on yourself...you are only human and humans are not perfect:) next time don't f-up for weeks, maybe a day or two.

    lots of love. b

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  2. Actually, our chat a couple weeks ago is what made me realize I really SHOULDN'T be too hard on myself, and you were totally right. The scale is forgiving and my body will bounce back. :) I made up for my weeks off track with a delicious veggie panini last night and plenty of time on my fitness.

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  3. And yes the cold weather puts a damper on fitness!!! I think if I didn't have boot camp in the winter time I'd be screwed. Definitely helps keep those feel-good endorphines pumping!

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